The Future Of Rumpublica
the convention was rockin’
and the future of Rumpublican politics
was on full display
as Spanky Rump Junior
fist pumped the crowd
ran to the podium
and started to spew
YO RUMPSTERS he howled
with glazed eyes
and I suppose it could have just been dried snot
caked under his nose
anyway
he began to fire bs like an AR-15
that his junior size hands lost control of
blahblahblahblahblahblah
blahblab I’m cool lablahblablahbla
blablahblablablahblablahbla
blah left lies blablahbla babes hblah
blablahbla booze blahblablahbla
hblblablahblablah fake news blblah
bla boobs blablahblablahblahblah
blablablablablab witch hunt lablablah
blblblblblblablblahblblblblblblbl
blablahblah cocaine blablahbla
blablblblblahblahblablblblah
bl fight bbblblabla shoot hbblblbla
blbbbbbbbbbbblabbbbbbb
bbbbbbl love big boobies bbbbb
bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb
bbla big guns bbbbbbbbbb
bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb
blblblablab sex lahblblahblablah
blahblabbblblblblahblblablah
blablahbl more boobies blah
blahblahblahblahblahblah
blahblahblablahblahblablahblah
HAIL RUMP PATRIOTS
FIGHT FOR RUMP
then with a final snort
and a deer that jumped through plate glass look
Junior bolted like a rocket out of sight
wow what could top that act
but the native rumpsters were restless
chanting WE WANT RUMP WE WANT RUMP
looking for flesh to keep them aroused
and it appeared in the form of
Rump Junior’s fame digger girlfriend
with huge too white teeth
between plump too red lips
and a too red dam of fabric
barely containing the arrogance she carried
like a brothel queen on steroids
across the stage
every rump man in the crowd
thought Jr’s gal pal was the bomb
and most of the women too
and then
her head exploded
ANYBODY WANNA PARTY she yelled
PARTY PARTY PARTY PARTY PARTY
to a chorus of YEEHAWs and YAYHOOs
then she formed a big O with her mouth
and began hemorrhaging
like straight out of the Exorcist
at warp volume
as if the audience was on the moon
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
BLA BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
BLA SEE MY BOOBS BLAH BLAH
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BL
BLAH BLAH SEX BLAH BLAH MONEY BLA
H I’M HOT BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
BLAH BLAH DONNIE’S BIG GUN BLAH BLAH
BLAH BLA BLAHH BLAH BLAH BLA BL BL BLA
H BLAH BLAH BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH
BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH
BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH BLAH BLAH
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
BLAH BIG RUMP BLAH BLAH MORE SEX BLAH
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
BL I’M LOST BLAH BLAH IN SPACE BLAH BLA
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
H BLAH BLAH SEE MY BIG BOOBS BLAH
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
THANK YOU FOR LOOKING AT ME
FELLOW RUMPSTERS
LET”S GO SPANK SOME RUMP YEAH
she took a bow to strip club clapping
for extra seconds of tv exposure
and so the boys in the audience
could adore her girls one more time
I guess that is a political tactic
act silly and jiggle ‘em
I’m sure that snags all the informed voters
all the stupid crap she screamed
didn’t even matter
just boobs and rumps
and throw in some guns
why wouldn’t we want them in charge
ooh I bet pillow talk is dangerous
–Anomynous Lee
