Driving With My Knees

In My Ears
I’ve got cicadas in my ears
millions of ‘em
subterraneans
lonesome bobs
horny
waiting seventeen years
buzzing and singing
en masse
a mad mating chorus
men calling for women
but there are no women
and it pisses them off
so they just keep howling
a tragic drone
and they never let up
a guy tried to tell me they were tinnitus
I called bullshit on that
after seventeen years
I’m telling you man
I’ve got horny pissed off cicadas
in my ears
and there is no doubt
that they’re driving me insane

—C Driver

The Line

it’s hard to walk the line

especially when it’s hard to see

you could go either way

without even knowing it

until it’s too late

maybe leaping off the line and running

is the best chance you’ve got

maybe it’s time to find out

—C Driver

Twenty Nine Years
she’ll see how the week goes
and then decide
every day it’s something
how much can she take anyway
living with that crazy bastard
twenty nine years
nothing changes
the next time I’m leaving she yells
she’s always going to leave
the shit she’s put up with
for twenty nine fucking years
give me one more reason and I’m outta here she yells

the old man slumps
in his beat to hell leather chair
with a cigar and a newspaper
and sighs
then
thinking he gave it enough time asks
is dinner ready

she squints her eyes
clenches her teeth
mumbles incoherently
and clanks two plates
hard
onto the table

the old man
scratches his belly
blows smoke coolly
into the tense air
and smiles
never doubting
a meal would follow

—C Driver

Blow Your Soul

alone in the darkness

lips caressing cool smooth metal

summoning from the depths

of heart and soul

all of the pain

and joy

of a thousand years

and a thousand things

he fills the emptiness

with all of the colors

and all of the textures

of everything

the spirit of the universe shimmers

blow your soul man

blow your soul

—C Driver

Later Man
long hair and beard
he looked
don’t fuck with me tough
he was the leader
of a biker club
leader of the pack
we worked together awhile
in the early seventies
we were both mellow guys
and we hit it off
we talked a lot
about life in general
he loved his mom and sister
and baseball
he was a student and philosopher
of everything
we laughed
and told stories of growing up
he was smart and funny
and beneath the tough exterior
was just a goofy kid like me
in the same time period
different hood
but we got along
and I liked him
we were sharing a joint
in the work parking lot one time
and he said
we’re all a bunch of pretzels
we start from the same goo
but get twisted a little different
and it gets baked in
which seemed funny at the time
and after work hours
we went our separate ways
and at some point
I quit the place
and never went back
and our friendship
faded into history

then I saw on the nightly news
a homicide
a man beaten
then shot dead
in an alley
behind a bar
on the near north side
they flashed a mug shot
of the killer
and it was him
leader of the pack
and I was stunned
I knew he lived
a little closer to the edge
where a lot of energy happens
both good and bad
obviously he found the worst
I don’t know what more to say

later man

— C Driver

Bag Of Dicks
so this guy
says to this other guy
you’re a whole bag of dicks
a whole bag of dicks he said
not half a whole bag of dicks
it snuck up on me
my twelve year old brain
became stimulated
an erection of the mind
where was I the day they taught us about
dicks in a bag
I had enough trouble
worrying about one small penis
but multiple dicks
whole bags full of dicks
wow the pictures in my head
I had questions
it’s a lot to consider
like how many dicks
are in a whole bag anyway
how big is the bag
is it paper or plastic
or canvas
and how big are the dicks
are they foot longs
or random sizes
colors styles
who does quality control
the dick testing and sorting
soft and supple
like Italian leather
hard and fast
like a Chinese jackhammer
durable and hardworking
like an midwest farm boy
and do they come
with or without balls
how are they harvested
by a dick picker
what exactly is the process
from body to bag
where do you even
get a bag of dicks
where do you get the dicks
to put in the bag
in a dark alley
Victoria’s Secret
or Dick’s
are dicks sporting goods
what’s the average dick size
what’s an average dick weigh
do they come by the pound
or by the stick
I mean you gotta know some of this stuff
are they fresh dicks
or day old
do you have to keep ‘em
in the fridge
do you suppose they sandblast
and powder coat prize dicks
in different colors
or maybe just stroke ‘em with beeswax
objects du art on a mantle
are there dick connoisseurs
dick collectors
dick experts
I’m gonna guess
a plastic grocery bag
full of big dicks
no balls
you get maybe a dozen dicks
like ears of sweet corn
the ugly heads popping out
toss in an extra dick
for a baker’s dozen
same size bag
gets you two eggplant size
or six large cucumbers
or maybe three dozen pickles
how many can you stuff in a duffel bag
can you mix dicks
say six large three small
are they individually wrapped
or freestyle
and the big question
why does anybody need
a whole bag of dicks
it’s embarrassing
to be so dick ignorant
but I’m trying to learn
any similar products out there
why not I guess
boxes of balls
pouches of nipples
buckets of boobs
big jars with lids
full of those furry snapdragon things
my friend warned me about
I mean what else don’t I know
my dad never had this conversation with me
crap I’ll never be able sleep tonight

— C Driver