To Prick The Festering Boil

To Prick The Festering Boil
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Bullseye
bullseye again
right on target
I’m the target
I’m always the target
I guess I don’t know
how to get out of the way
his anger seeks me out
lashes itself on
and rides me
until I’m blue
then pushes me away
and goes about the business
of gathering more angst
to vampire my energy
all over again

take a break
let me breathe
I’m an old man
tired and beaten down
from being the target
such an easy target
and yet every time
it catches me off guard
and jolts my world
like a canon ball
to my chest
bullseye

I’m old and tired
please let me breathe

— DL Madsen

To Prick The Festering Boil
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Spinning Spinning
I heard a woman say
she’s not heartbroken
for not having children
I wouldn’t have been a good mother she said
a very brave and poetic thought
an emotional and intelligent thought
wouldn’t it be wonderful
if all the people
whose children end up
broken and defeated
beaten down and abused
by broken and defeated adults
who once were
beaten down and abused themselves
wouldn’t it be wonderful
if they were brave and poetic
and thought with emotion and intelligence
and said to themselves
I wouldn’t be a good parent
instead of having children
they really don’t want
and imposing the heartbreak
of their own childhoods
into the laps and childhoods
of their children
before simply walking away
leaving everyone broken

when you have a shitty day in golf
and pound your club into the ground
you look stupid
and the club gets broken
but when you have a shitty day in life
and you beat your kids into the ground
you look much more than stupid
you look desperate and afraid
and innocent lives get broken
children aren’t a game
they aren’t objects
how do we keep breakables
out of the reach
of adults with shitty lives

the rhythm of the earth
is speeding up
life is speeding up
the brokenness of the world
is speeding up
and our children are
spinning
spinning

— DL Madsen

To Prick The Festering Boil
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A Million Pieces
fear
like the moment
before the fire explodes
the mad and desperate way
he looks at the boy
and the way the boy looks back
anticipating the worst
nowhere to hide
YOU STUPID LITTLE FUCKER
then the solid slap
of big knuckles
on cherubic face
crumbling the boy to the floor
GET UP
GET UP YOU SISSY
TAKE IT LIKE A MAN
YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT
then the hard dirty sole
of a size ten
on the boy’s shoulder
pushing pushing
into the floor
until the boy almost disappears
220 pounds against 50
domination and control
of an eight year old child

then the final kick off
YOU FUCKIN’ LITTLE BABY
and the gorilla
satisfied for this moment
sulks away mumbling
for another drink of courage maybe
coward that he is

fear
the thread
between the broken
and the breakable
how far will the man go
to not be afraid of his life anymore
how much can the boy take
before he shatters
into a million pieces too

—DL Madsen

It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.”

Frederick Douglass
To Prick The Festering Boil
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What Kind
what kind of human being
what kind of mother
cries with her babies in her arms
and vows to always keep them safe
but then
approves of a man
who abuses her children
more than she approves of her children
protects a man
who abuses her children
more than she protects her children
what kind of a mother
could ever love a man
who abuses her children
more than she loves her children

what kind

what kind

—DL Madsen

“It’s easier to build strong children than to repair broken men”

— Frederick Douglass

To Prick The Festering Boil
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I’m Not Here To Be Sad (lyrics)
I don’t bother nobody
I don’t go lookin’ for trouble
I’m not much of a fighter
but too much of a lover
and I try to do the right thing
when the wrong thing’s so easy to do
I’m not here to be sad
nothin’s so bad
that I can’t make it through

I try not to hurt anybody
but ohhh I feel all the pain
like the weight of the world
fallin’ down on me like rain
but I try to remember
what a very wise man once said
I’m not here to be sad
nothin’s so bad
gotta live till I’m dead

I try to love everybody
when everybody don’t love me
I live with passion and compassion
walk a mile in their shoes just to see
my religion is kindness
love is my philosophy
I’m not here to be sad
nothin’s so bad
gotta set myself free

I miss my mother
brother sister and father
but losing my sons
was almost the death of me
but my love keeps growing
into eternity
I’m not here to be sad
nothin’s so bad
gotta set myself free

a lot of bad stuff happens
to good people everyday
no use whinin’ and complainin’
and it never changed nothin’ to pray
gotta keep on moving
so the pain don’t catch up with you
I’m not here to be sad
nothin’s so bad
that I can’t make it through

I’m not here to be sad
nothin’s so bad
gotta live till I’m dead

—DL Madsen